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Monday, July 6, 2009

Are You Having a Marital Problem?

I am not qualified to talk about marital problems. I am still in my paper anniversary and so far, everything in my marriage is fine. Not perfect but fine. Though we disagree on many things, our marriage is Good and I can't ask for more. I am glad to have found each other.

Are you having a marital problem? This question just popped up in my mind after one of my friend texted me and says, she wanted a divorce. I was worried because she told me before that they are having problems. The warmth of love was vanished after only six months in marriage. They are on their third year now and I guess its not getting any better. The husband provide her material things she needs but, when it comes to sending money to her family back home, he was fed up.

I met the husband, he is a good person but, first time we talk, he immediately told me that he love to help the family of her wife but, he knows how to limit it. I wondered why he open up his concern to me considering it was our first meeting. As I said, he gave her material needs and I thought there will be no conflicts in their relationship. Guess not.

This is all I can say though:

On Money- every marriage have this problem. Husband and wife should sit and talk about what are their priorities. Both should share and give their part for the bills. I am saying this according to what's right and not because of culture. To avoid conflicts, share your blessings to the family.

Ignite the Romance- ohh well, you know what i mean. Know the physical needs of your beloved. Husband comes home so tired from work, wives should devote time to take care of him and vice versa. Learn the interests of your behalf. Give flowers, love notes, surprises and gifts. Watch a concert or movies together. Doing things which are out of the ordinary can give spark to your relationship.

The best thing that you can do if you have a marital problem is to initiate a pleasant Communication. Talk about the problem before the day is over. There is danger if you just let it pass by. One problem will pile up until you can no longer settle the problem. If it is worth saving for, save the marriage.

Marital Problem continues to exist when one does all the talking and the other won't listen. Communication can build bridges. It takes two to settle the problem and always respect the decision of one another. Get advice from your parents, siblings and friends that you trusted. Do not stress yourself. Make your life worth living for.

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This is another story. It has no connection in the story above.
Just want you all to loosen up and have a good smile.

10 comments:

  1. When I counsel marriages I always use two biblical principles in advising couples. These principles are, "It is more blessed to give than to receive", and "Do unto others as you would have them do unto you." Marriage is about unconditional love. The book The Love Dare is a GREAT book to teach couples how to gain the fullest out of their marriages, and the greatest principle taught is the need for selflessness. On the subject of caring for one's in-laws or parents 1 Timothy 5:4 tells us ...our first responsibility is to show godliness at home and repay our parents by taking care of them. This is something that pleases God. I encourage families to share all things (i.e. finances) and when making decisions always come to an agreement and decide to do what's in the best interest of the family. Follow Scripture, anyone who puts into practice biblical principles will experience success in marriage. - Reverend Hank Williams

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  2. wow! i agree on what anonymous says :) sounds like a great adviser.. it says it all!

    love honesty and trust in any relationship is vital but most of all GOD should be at the center of it..

    nice post my dear!! weeeee lapit na tlga!!!

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  3. great post Ate Amz.....great advice as well....Greg and I have been married for almost 5 years now...we have been through thick and thin....but we compromise....correct! COMMUNICATION is one of the keys in marriage...if you have something in mind ..you need to express it out and let your behalf know what you feel...either you are jealous, mad or whatever....that is what I've learned about marriage life....about financial issues...hubby is very lucky because he don;t need to support my family in the PI....and never send any single dime to them....how I wish someday I can give them something extra...siguro pag naka settle nami....:) that is my share....:)

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  4. it is always the open communication that works. :)

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  5. Hello there Ams! We got back since Sunday but wasn't able to visit blogs till now. They got sick (diarrhea) except me. We actually brought our son to the hospital today because he is fevered (still is till now.).

    I would like to thank you all for the wonderful and encouraging words you said and left at my blogs. For the sympathy and prayers, and for those who shared their blessings to the family! May God bless you all for your compassionate hearts!

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  6. i had a failed marriage but i cant do anything for a bigamous marriage contracted to me. i am afraid of another failed marriage. all i can say is, if the marriage can still be saved, then by all means make it work. God should be put in the center of marriage,without Him all things are put to naught.

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  7. Hi Amy, it is sad to hear so and so is getting a divorce.. so many in fact.. and now it involves my own good frens as well... i did a few posts on that, she read it yesterday in fact... she is very sad to know her husband has suddenly changed, so heart broken too... each time she feels sad and cried, she will call me, though i cannot do much but just listen ... console her..that all is not lost even if husband stops loving her..

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  8. Hi! My first time here in your interesting site coming from Beng of Entertainment Spree. Happy Birthday, Amy!

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  9. I believe in COMPROMISE as the key to a successful marriage. Without it, the feelings you felt before to one another will flow off gradually and the strong feeling of dislike will step in which eventually will cause negative effect to the relationship.

    I heard a lot of stories about money being the root of a broken marriage aside from infidelity. But hey,sometimes we seldom acknowledged that the silent culprit here is acculturation. It is significant that two parties understand both cultures otherwise conflict is inevitable.


    However, you made some points here Ams and I agree with that. But one particular thing I want to elaborate, financial capability of the husband matters the most too. Once he earns more than enough to the family, I believe he would care less if his wife is supporting her extended family back home.

    That's my opinion :)

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I love to read your comments. Thank you so much and I will visit back.

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